Date: 11/17/2003 2:15:00 PM
From Authorid: 53284
Take him out to lunch, then make it short and sweet. Kind of like pulling a bandaid off quickly. A moment of pain, then it's over. Otherwise you have to resort to the singing telegram, and that usually doesn't go over to well.  |
Date: 11/17/2003 2:17:00 PM ( From Author )
From Authorid: 15232
Out to lunch!? Oh man, I don't think I can do it face-to-face though. lol, the singing telegram seems a little too cheery for this occasion. hehehe  |
Date: 11/17/2003 2:17:00 PM ( From Author )
From Authorid: 15232
hmm, St. Pete, that's a good idea. Although, it would have to be true for me to do that.  lol |
Date: 11/17/2003 2:17:00 PM
From Authorid: 12835
Show him my picture and tell him he's no longer number 1 in your life....  |
Date: 11/17/2003 2:19:00 PM
From Authorid: 17688
im sorry karen  i dont know what to tell you just let him know how you feel and im sure he will understand  |
Date: 11/17/2003 2:21:00 PM ( From Author )
From Authorid: 15232
Thanks Dale.  Yeah, I think I'll do that, but I'm so nervous. |
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Date: 11/17/2003 2:24:00 PM
From Authorid: 17688
dont be , hes a big boy. im sure he can handle it |
Date: 11/17/2003 2:44:00 PM ( Admin )
Married?.. are you married?.. The best way is to just play the song different drummer..  |
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Date: 11/17/2003 2:46:00 PM ( From Author )
From Authorid: 15232
No, I was married before. I'm divorced, and have dated 2 guys since then. The first was the easy break up, and now this second guy. |
Date: 11/17/2003 2:47:00 PM
From Authorid: 21867
There is no such thing as a painless break-up...unfortunately thats part of package of emotional investment, when the investment goes sour there will always be pain. Though, realistically *and this is only coming from my perspective* the truth is preferable. Be honest and open with him, let him know that you do not hold him in your heart in the way you previously did. Too many times people look for the 'easy let-down', the 'don't worry, you are such a great guy, love will come your way soon enough blah blah blah' patronising crap is just more painful than being honest. There is no easy let-down, there is only variations of painful drops...thats how it is, that is unavoidable, that is outside your control...so all you can do is be straight up with him and just let the cards fall where they might. Peace,  |
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Date: 11/17/2003 2:53:00 PM ( From Author )
From Authorid: 15232
Thanks ^^ I really appreciate your advice. I will do precisely that. |
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Date: 11/17/2003 2:58:00 PM
From Authorid: 21867
...yeah, I know it sounds harsh, but a 'quick clean cut' is the best way in the end. Another thing to do is NOT leave any future openings, don't go down the whole "Perhaps in the future things will change" route...unless you truly mean it. That dangling carrot is another I've noticed people use many times and it just impedes upon the guys healing from the hurt. It sucks completely...but again, thats life, thats love...when it doesn't work it doesn't work and no amount of covering up for it, no amount of worrying about how the other is going to react, no amount of wishful thinking will change that simple inalienable fact. In the end he will likely understand and appreciate some brutal honesty. Wish you and him well in your healing. Peace, |
Date: 11/17/2003 3:00:00 PM
From Authorid: 13297
I would go along with what Agent Smith said, just tell him the truth, not rude but to the point. Don't beat around the bush and don't sugar coat it - just tell him you no longer feel the same way you once did. I would also do it in person - there is nothing worse than being broken up with via telephone or something similarly impersonal. I think it shows that you have respect for the other person if you tell them face to face.  |
Date: 11/17/2003 3:11:00 PM
From Authorid: 49689
Whyyyyyyyyy Karen? Whyyyyyyyyy would you do this to me? After all the good times we had together you have to dump me like this  ... lol :-p  |
Date: 11/17/2003 3:42:00 PM
From Authorid: 19625
Honesty is always the best policy, so my advice is to tell him straight out, you're gay. Heehee, just kiddin, I was never too good at the break-up bit actually, but everyone who replied has some really good advice as to what to do. Good Luck! Erin-  |
Date: 11/17/2003 3:44:00 PM
From Authorid: 13283
Ouch ! Well nice guys usually finish last because they are just too darn nice . A woman needs her fun and she needs her adventure . Karen , you want your life to be a thrill ride and I understand that . Tell him he is a great guy , but that it just wasnt working out between you two . Be honest with him and thank him for the time you spent with him . You are young and you have a right to look for a man that is just right for you . Guys come up short alot when it comes to romancing a woman and showing her a genuinly good time . Women like to talk and they love to laugh . I dont think he was doing that enough for you Karen . Take cares and be gentle with him , but face to face ! Razzy aka  |
Date: 11/17/2003 4:18:00 PM
From Authorid: 27583
start talking about wanting to get married and watch him run for the hills. hee hee  |
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Date: 11/17/2003 4:21:00 PM
From Authorid: 16000
have u ever thought that maybe he is qiuet (especially around your family) because he likes you so much! i am a very hiper outgoing person but when i get around guys i like i freeze up and act shy......it has only been a few months so maybe you should give the guy a chance and talk to him about it.....just say that you feel as though you might not have much in common because he is so quiet and that makes it difficult to get to know him better....ya never know he might open up.....just try to give him a chance before you shoo him out the door |
Date: 11/17/2003 5:04:00 PM
From Authorid: 31048
I feel your pain...I'm kind of in the same situation. I've been dating this guy for about a month and a half but I'm always busy so I don't get to see him as much as I'd like to, and when I do see him he's so quiet. I really like him but I don't think I can make this work. And I'm horrible with break-ups so it looks like we're both stuck in the same boat! I guess I should take the advice on this post, eh? Whatever you do, good luck  |
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Date: 11/18/2003 6:58:00 AM ( From Author )
From Authorid: 15232
Awww, Py, I'm so sorry, but it has to be done. lol And, RAZ! You make me sound like I'm some wild thrill seeker, who doesn't want this guy cause he's nice. lol That's not true man! He is really quiet around EVERYONE, even his own family!! I need more of a talker, I need more substance. I am going to wait a little bit I think, and give him a chance, like Italian Queen said. It's not that he's shy around my family...he's very, very mellow...almost too slow for me. But, we'll see. I'll give it a little longer, and I'll talk to him about it. Thanks for all your help guys!! Oh, and WoodenNickel, I don't think he'd run for the hills. I think he'd propose!! That's what scares me! lol |
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Date: 11/18/2003 6:58:00 AM ( From Author )
From Authorid: 15232
Blondie, good luck as well!!! |
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Date: 11/18/2003 9:12:00 AM
From Authorid: 62416
The truth hurts! But it shall set him free. Sometimes it's more insulting to try and be nice about it. Give him the respect he deserves and be honest. Do it in person, we all have to face a little rejection sometimes. It will make him stronger and give him character. Put yourself in his shoes, how would you want to be told? Best of luck.. *hugs* - Gypsy |
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Date: 2/15/2004 11:02:00 PM
From Authorid: 51811
There's no easy way of doing it. Just tell him in person he at the least deserves that. just tell him that you don't want anyone in your life right now as you just went through a difficult relationship and want to just date or the freedom to meet new people? and you only see him as a good friend, or friend ,Or brother. Hope this helps? N......... |
