My brother 'DOUG' died on June 15th 1989 of cancer. He was only 11 years old . I was age 16 at the time. I had been by his side at the hospital for days and I had been sleeping on a table with a phonebook as a pillow and only a thin white sheet to cover myself with. I told my mother I was going to go to my grandmother's to take a shower and get some sleep. She felt he was going to die soon and did'nt want me to go. But I had grown up in a christian home and went to a private christian school and believed with all of my heart that GOD would heal him and that he was'nt going to die. After all, 1 year earlier the doctors were going to operate and try to remove the cancer but did'nt because they said it would spread and that he was going to die in less than 2 weeks anyway .... He lived 1 year longer than the doctors had given him that time, and since he had lived through that I was sure he would make it this time too..... so I went against my mother's wishes and went to my grandmother's to stay for the night. I got a quick shower and before I went to sleep I said a little prayer for ! Doug. He had looked so tired and restless in that hospital bed and so I just asked,' GOD,' ' please let Doug rest tonight and dont let him suffer any more because I feel like he has already suffered enough.' Shortly after that prayer, I drifted off to sleep. Some time later I began to have this dream. I saw Doug just laying there in the hospital bed with his eyes closed and his arms laying limp and lifeless. I then saw someone cover his whole body up with a white bed sheet. I began to weep uncontrolably in my dream as I watched my mother dial my grandmother's phone number from Doug's bed side. SUDDENLY... I woke up. I sat up and wiped the tears from my eyes. I then walked to the bathroom to wash my face and thought,'thank GOD it was just a dream.' As I looked in to the mirror at my red and somewhat swollen eyes and began to wash my face, the phone rang. Some how I knew it was my mother before my grandfather even answered it so I walked into the kitchen and he said in a sad vo! ice, 'honey, it's for you, it's your mother.' I began to sob before I even took the phone from him. She told me his blood pressure was dropping and that I'd better come to the hospital that they were loosing him. I hug up and got there as fast as I could, but got held up in the hospital elevator. I was 5 minutes too late. He had began to hemorrhage and choked to death on his own blood at 5:35 am . By the time I got to his room the doctors and nurses had cleaned him up. Mom said she was glad I was'nt there when he died because she knew I could'nt have taken it. IT STILL MAKES ME CRY WHEN I THINK ABOUT IT. SOOOOOOOO, was God trying to prepare me for what was to come by the dream I had, just 1 &1/2 hours before my brother died? How did my mother know he was going to die the night before he actually did? How did I know that phone call was for me and that it was my mother? ( mansion7dr@aol.com) my e-mail address stands for: MANSION # 7 DOUGLAS RUSSELL My mother and I have said for years this is Doug's address now: Douglas Russell Mansion #7 HEAVEN This too is another unsolved mystery, but I will have to tell that one some other time. sincerely, L.M.B. How it changed my life:I think my mom was right. I don't think I could have taken it had I been there watching him die. In my dream I felt like Doug was'nt in pain any more and I felt at peace with that but, I was sobbing because I knew he was gone and I would'nt be able to hold him or hear his vioce say, 'Hey Sis, come help me.' and that I would never have the chance to tell him how much he meant to me ever again. This has changed my life in such a way that I always want to do for others all that I possibly can and no matter what I always always tell those I love just how special the are too me and how much I love them. I have had the desire to work with children that are term. ill or handicapped ever since my brother's death. To this day I have not been successful in getting my foot in the door (so to speak) so that this type of job could some day be mine. I have not had the $$$$ it takes to go to school for that field of work but I know that even if it's only to serve them their lunch o! r help the down the hall I could'nt be happier! Hopefully I will somehow someday be able to have such a job that I have thought so much about for the last 9 years.
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